Save me From this Body of Death

Do you ever get Homesick? Do you ever truly long to cast off this endless battle between the warring conflicts within and walk upon the streets of gold? Most days the heavy gravity of my meager efforts of Christianity burden my heart to tears. I feel so frustrated doing all that wish I didn’t do and doing none of that which I wish to do. I realize that I will never have true rest until I go home. Though I am a Christian and through Christ I have been freed from sin, I am still human and the enemy still wars within me daily trying to drag me back within fleshy slavery. This earth is so beautiful. Sometime I am moved to tears as I stand in the face of awe, surveying the indescribable splendor God has created. And man, man too can be extraordinary.  Rich in honor, imagination, and love—as humans, weak as we are, we sometimes demonstrate the very deepest forms of divine beauty and emotion. When I look sometimes at things we can dream up, the amazing paintings, the heart moving songs, the tender words of poetry—I think to myself, if man can create such beauty on his own, what then shall heaven be like? It must be so much more awesome, so much more phenomenal, so much more unthinkable than I could possibly imagine. 

And some days, I feel so tired of being here. I feel exhausted battling my prideful spirit, and trying to talk sense into my doubtful mind—I grow weary of always encouraging my self-condemning thoughts and some days I just feel too grouchy and too cynical to be sweet and gentle. The pretty dreams of Heaven fade in my mind and the story of Redemption seems more like a story…and not something real.

I know this is all part of the weariness of life. The daily crosses we must bear, the persecutions from the world, the darts from the unseen enemies—we must be soldiers of Christ and press on, fighting the good fight. And for Christ, I would gladly bear it all. Some days, however, I just wish he’d come and take me home and save me from this body of death!  For if Paul was the chief of all sinners, I must be the second in line!

‘What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!” Romans 7:24-25

“Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners--of whom I am the worst.” 1 Tim 1:15

“He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever." Rev 21:4